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Posts Tagged ‘love’

 

The greatest thing you’ll ever learn is just to love and be loved in return.  This was a  memorable line in the movie, Moulin Rouge.

I am sitting at this beautiful park in the middle of a National Forrest in Ocala, Florida.  The weather is warm and sunny.  My partner and I just enjoyed a swim in a hot spring near our campsite.  It’s been a relaxing and sensuous vacation–taking in the natural splendor of the green trees swaying in the gentle breeze and the many birds harmoniously chirping all around us–the perfect backdrop for love and romance.  All couples need time alone to cultivate intimacy and to share affection.  The longer you’ve been together the greater the necessity, because familiarity tends to breed contempt or at the very least inertia.

Romantic gestures are easy when you just start a new relationship.  When the thrill of discovering the intricacies of another person becomes your greatest concern and delight.  It’s called the honeymoon effect.  Your mind is filled with wonder and happiness fills your heart.  You feel energetic and think anything is possible.  The trick is to keep this feeling alive all the time.  We can love all aspects of our life, not just the pursuit of a new partner.

Dr. Bruce Lipton said that when he muscle tested people on the question, Do you love yourself, a surprising 80% tested negatively.  If we were brought up in a critical environment chances are good that we don’t love our self.  We were programmed from our family, church and schools to think we are unworthy of love due to some flaw or weakness.  We have to change our negative beliefs about ourselves and then we will be able to create more loving relationships.  Quiet the mind and live in our hearts.  The heart doesn’t judge and criticize, it just loves.

How many of us can look in the mirror each day and say “I love you”?  I don’t have an easy time at it.  Yet, all we really want in life is to be loved.  How do we expect to attract someone to love us, if we can’t give that love to ourself first?  If that’s the case for you, take a hand mirror and stare into your eyes for 20 minutes a day, until you get to the point that you can say those three words and truly mean it.  Compassion will fill your eyes when you finally get how truly lovable you are.  We are born in the image of God, what’s not to love?  We are magnificent beings and deserving of all the goodness life has to offer.

I was in a bathroom stall here at the campsite and I saw a graffiti drawing of a heart with an exclamation point.  This provoked me to inquire deeper into the idea of love as an action, not just a feeling.  Being committed to serving other people day after day with joyfulness, even in difficult circumstances.  Our loved ones know us so well and have a knack at pressing our buttons.  We may want to run and hide when that happens or to strike back, instead count to ten and see each offense as an opportunity to answer a call for love.  Usually when someone is treating you badly, it’s because they are unhappy about something.  We can patiently wait with a calm presence until they find their center again.  It’s called holding the space.  After all, there will be times when you may want to act out and wouldn’t it be nice if you set the precedent for loving kindness first?  Then when it’s your time, they will return the favor, that is, if they’re mature enough to know how.

I remember my ex mother-in-law saying that every couple hits a bump in the road at some point in their relationship, and that some people grow together from the experience and some grow apart.  She said that ultimately you don’t know the strength of your relationship until you pass that test.  When my marriage hit that bump we didn’t have what it took to stay together.  My current partner and I have hit a few bumps and we keep growing closer from each trial and tribulation we face together.

No matter what happens in life, be it divorce or some other rift in our close relationships…we always have a choice to continue to love others.  And just because you may not be speaking with loved ones doesn’t mean you stop loving them.  I keep everyone in my heart and pray unendingly for their health, happiness and peace.  That is the true definition of unconditional love, when it can be given freely regardless of the situation.  Wanting the best for everyone.  Sometimes the most loving act we can do for another is to set them free and wish them well.  Many relationships have expiration dates and if we’re honest with ourselves we know when it’s time to move on.

We are constantly getting the opportunity to test our ability to love.  A Course In Miracles says that there are only two emotions, love and fear, and that you cannot experience them at the same time.  If we are thinking any thoughts that are pulling us from the love energy, it means we are allowing ourselves to reside in fear energy.  God is never separate from us, we only think He is because we aren’t allowing ourselves to feel His presence.  The same with love, it waits patiently for us to return to our hearts instead of in our heads which tells us a zillion reasons not to love.

“Your task is not to seek for love, but merely to seek and find all the barriers within yourself that you have built against it.”  ~Rumi

 

The other day I became disappointed with my beloved when he shaved off his beard.  We hold love back when we place conditions on it.  How many of us do this with our lists of what we want our partner to look and act like.  I have a few guy friends who are single and wish they were in a relationship.  However, when I ask them what they’re looking for they are very specific with physical traits, like she has to be thin and pretty.

 

We must love deeply like a poet and seek it like a thirsty person seeks water.  See each person through the eyes of God and recognize their inner beauty.  Love like a mother holding her newborn baby, seeing the miracle of life in all it’s splendor.

 

How can we be more loving?  We can start by saying I love you to our family and friends, never leave without giving a hug and wishing each person many blessings.  Choose to resolve our differences with acceptance, offer to lend a hand to those in need, say thank you, cuddle more, be courteous and respectful, forgive easily, say I’m sorry, be encouraging and supportive.  This can be a lifelong process.  Keep finding more ways to love.

 

“When the power of love overcomes the love of power, the world will know peace.”  Like John Lennon promoted back in the 60’s, make love, not war.  If we all behaved like newlyweds, life would be beautiful and people would be happy.  Love heals all and is the answer to all our problems.  It really is that simple.  Just love.

 

 

Sitaji Devi is a Professional Astrologer and Psychic Medium in Farmington, Maine offering “life coaching” Readings.  Her website is www.Sitaji.com.  Call (207) 491-2313 or email sitajidevi@yahoo.com to schedule an appointment.

 

 

 

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